What is real love




















The love of their life was distinct in ways that were very clear, oftentimes from some of the very first moments they ever spent together. When you meet the love of your life, suddenly, the things that have typically been the most important in a relationship — great sex, good hair, a good job — can seem unimportant.

While you may believe in love at first sight, the reality is that love, at first sight, is more about attraction and infatuation than true love. This is why true love takes so long to recognize — many other factors go into making an individual fall for someone and stay in love with someone else.

In fact, it takes about a year for the infatuation phase of a relationship to dissipate and for true love to creep in. This is why young love often does not last.

It is incredibly difficult to stay in long-term relationships with people who have not experienced the same things that you have.

After graduation, a girl may move out of her house, move into a college dorm, and meet many new people who can change her viewpoints in ways that she never thought possible. True love can also fade, but perhaps not quite so abruptly. Sometimes people naturally grow apart. The good news is that it is possible to find true love again with someone else. Of course, you can continue to be happy with someone, even when your wants and needs are vastly different from those you had when you first met your longtime love.

This is because you can always find people who share similar values to the ones you hold now. Think about everything you enjoy. Is there only one fan of the Steelers out there? Or one person attending a particular Broadway show?

No — there are thousands of good men and women out there who share similar interests — maybe multiple of the same ones. There are thousands of people who share your political views, your views on raising children, and your religious beliefs. Just because one relationship has ended, sad as it may be, does not mean that your romantic life has to end here. Every day is another chance to meet someone new and be happy. While it can feel like there are rules and standards as to what the truest true love requires and entails, the fact of the matter is that accounts from even the happiest, longest-lasting couples will differ greatly in many aspects.

Just as every individual is so different, every wonderful relationship is a completely distinct permutation of love. Passion, puppy love, volatile relationships, teen romance — all these things have labels and diagnostic signs that point them out, simple as filling out a checklist.

True love is , simple as that. Want to learn more about true love vs. Reach out to one of our counselors for more information and advice. However, it can be consistently assumed that relationships with an element of real love are predicated on mutual understanding, patience, communication, empathy, and selflessness to a healthy extent. Love requires these things to thrive, and sometimes even in new relationships, you can tell whether or not the seeds of mutual understanding are being sown, or if, in the long run, you two will never come to have a stable, good relationship.

A person who is in love wants to direct a great deal of their attention and interest towards the object of their affection — if this individual is paying a greater amount of attention to you than they might to other people, this could indicate romantic interest or even love. They might also seem particularly emotionally in tune with you, to the point where they might experience your pain alongside you or feel joy when you feel joyful.

It can be hard to figure out if you are truly in love with someone or if you rely on their company and attention for comfort — sometimes, the way these two things look from the outside can make them seem interchangeable. If your focus is on your relationship label, the security their attention makes you feel and seem like the ideal couple; you may be attached to them. In a real loving relationship, you trust your partner enough to be away from them, to give them space, and to grow and explore with them.

In an attachment relationship, the focus is often on remaining static and comfortable, and it can oftentimes be self-serving rather than mutually beneficial. Unfortunately, yes, even true love can fade and dissipate over time. Images in the media of love that lasts forever or love that can endure massive strain are romantic.

As most of us have seen and even experienced ourselves, even some of the most loving, stable couples can drift apart over time or have sudden falling-outs resulting from the end of the relationship. This post is all about answering the question: what is real love. This is, without a doubt, a huge, massive, complicated, profound question. But, what I do have is a sincere interest in studying and learning about love. I am obsessed with love and have dedicated a lot of my life to learning about it and discovering it as best I can.

I also have what I would consider to be a happy marriage that has love in abundance. So you can feel pretty good that I have at least some kind of handle on it, and that my intentions are as pure as can be. One of my main reasons for writing this post is because I am a person who suffers from anxiety. So does my husband. And in truth, so does practically everyone I know. While anxiety can affect many different areas in our lives, for me and Nathan, relationship anxiety was one of the ones we dealt with in the beginning of our relationship.

See also: Reassurance Seeking , Separation Anxiety. In my research, I found that there are many, many men and women experiencing a lot of these same types of anxieties and fears. I learned a great deal from the work of therapist Sheryl Paul and her r elationship anxiety e-courses. What this leads to is a general misunderstanding of what love is and how to be in a relationship. Our notions about love come from many places, including popular culture and media, but a lot of the ideas have simply become ingrained over time.

You just need to find the right One; your Soulmate. I have zero interest in the idea that there is one special person for everyone out there on this big-ass planet.

Again, ew. You are not an incomplete person without a partner. A lot of people think it does. Has society influenced your relationship expectations?

Do you believe that love should be like a romantic comedy? Should proposals be over-the-top declarations of romance? Speaking of feelings, are they meant to be as dramatic as we envision?

Is love really a heart-exploding event filled with nonstop passion? Okay, so like, why do we even love? Real happiness is a profound and lasting sense of peace and fulfillment that deeply satisfies and enlarges the soul. It survives and even grows during hardship and struggle. True happiness is our entire reason to live, and it can only be obtained as we find Real Love and share it with others.

Annual Reports. What is Real Love? So, how can you find Real Love? Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without wanting anything in return. What is Conditional Love? With Real Love, nothing else matters; without it, nothing else is enough. Robert Firestone has further developed an approach to challenging old, engrained patterns and defenses, a process he refers to as differentiation.

This process involves four steps:. Taking these steps of differentiation allows us to live in a less defended state in which we go after what we really want in life. Learn more about Differentiation. Many answers to why love fades can be found in understanding how and why we form a fantasy bond.

The fantasy bond is the ultimate defense against love. To avoid a fantasy bond, we should avoid the characteristics listed above but also take the following actions. Be careful. Often without eye contact, less affection due to sensory differences and little to no verbal affirmations. Real true love really existed in the past when the real good old fashioned ladies were around which today it is a very different story altogether unfortunately. Love is not about the submission of a woman to a man, or vice versa.

It is an emotion, and a choice, that affects our lives daily. If what you want is a perfect woman, you will never find it. I suggest strongly that you look within yourself and discover who you really are before you make haughty expectations for others.

It states right there in the article that love is a verb. Love, as a noun, is not an emotion per se, but an attraction, acceptance and affection towards someone or something.

Hate is a type of repulsion and rejection. The elements of love require some attraction, agreement at some level and communication. The intensity of love can vary based on the level of attraction, agreement and communication. The more you communicate things both partners find positive and agreeable, beneficial and of interest, the more the relationship will flourish. One way love can exist as in unrequited love but true love requires mutual communication, mutual attraction and shared interests with some commonality in how each view reality.

Love is indeed an emotion because I can feel it. I doubt you have really experienced to be in love. It is a feeling and an action that is from the feeling itself. You can act without a feeling, and that is not true love. Pierce, women back in the old days made love very easy to find compared to today. Now most women have their very high unrealistic expectations and standards.

May they grow very old all alone with their Cats. Women in the past had real class compared to the very horrible ones that are everywhere these days. Today feminism is cancer. Well my husband and I did marry as virgins. I would honestly have to admit now that in our experience to do this was a mistake. It takes the love and respect and chemistry. Getting to feel that both of you. True love actually hurts sometimes when you are away from each other. This is a classic epistle I have read about love and its meaning.

A detailed study of the above, one will find out that there are many who think that they are in love why they are not. For instance, a young man whose parents were opposing the lady he wanted to marry.

One thing i knew about love is that those who say they are in love, they must be ready and willing to sacrifice for each other and as well as do things that will make the love to grow. Enjoyed the info. Very informative and eye opening.

I still believe that we are capable of loving Someone for a lifetime. I believe that whatever characteristics and behavior you had when u met, u should consider growing along the same during your lifetime. Yes we change, when we truly love, our moral compass should be pointed in a common direction. Most enlightening thing I learned from this read was to remain an individual.

What I know about true is that love that shares good times together but most importantly when it has the power to over come all the misunderstandings between the two of you only that power can lead to everlasting love. But true love exists just that it is rare. My rational and scientific mind read and agreed with a lot of what was said in this article. However, I am one of those hopeless romantics as stated who yearns for more than what life is currently giving. I was once told that a relationship should come naturally.

Yes you have a few disagreements, but for the most part, it should flow without major issues or effort. Then, there is everyone else saying that relationships take work and nothing comes easy.

But how do we know which is true? Are there really relationships out there were the couple have this ultimate connection and never truly have to work too much to keep it flowing? Do we just think that isnt the case because so many have never found that and have just excepted that relationships do truly take a lot of time and effort?

Which is real? That is the question I want to answer. It ebs and flows. At times it will fell effortless and other times it takes effort. Although there are ebbs and flow In a relationship , if a relationship is more effort and work then it is mutually loving and easy going then, I would consider that the partnership might not compatible.

Every relationship comes with its issues, baggage and work , but if the good outweighs the bad then the partnership is worth the effort and keeping. In my experience, love feels easy and joyful most of the time. We have problems that come up, especially when one or both of us are under stress. And the good far outweighs the bad overall. Love is so uncertain.



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